RIP Joe Strummer.

This is the way to do it!

Genius!

Drive Through Job Applications - Day 8 of Recession America season 1 - watch more funny videos

If you are miserable...

"Grip, pull, grip, pull, grip, pull..."

Borat's Guide to Jobs - watch more funny videos

Like totally...

GET TO WORK, TEENS! from Everything Is Terrible on Vimeo.

Writing...

Back to the grind. I am going to use as much of my free time to get back to writing this little how to guide and then all of this should tie together and make some sense. Well, that's the plan at least.

Winky Dinky Dog

If you haven't seen Hollywood Shuffle yet, do yourself a favor and check it out.
It's a classic!

Whatever, Whatevers...you know what I mean?

 Yeah Ghost...I know what you mean.

Have you ever killed a man...with your mind?

Occupation: Stand Up Philosopher

"I coalesce the vapors of human experience into a viable and meaningful comprehension."

Working for the Rat Race, you know you're wasting your time...

We belong to the Deadbeat Club.

B-52's - Deadbeat Club
Uploaded by jpdc11. - Music videos, artist interviews, concerts and more.

Birth, School, Work, Death

All the OG's are disappearing.

Jim Carroll Rest In Peace

Getting paid for loafing.

 I have a friend, we'll call him "Mr. Henry". Mr. Henry situated things at a job where he got paid to sit around all day, surf the internet, talk on aim and essentially keep the day moving so he looked busy. Yes, with the right skills, a little ingenuity and a little luck you too can achieve the same. With the right attitude, tools and skills you too can get paid to "loaf". More on Mr. Henry later...

And this is me expressing myself.

Tip numero uno: Sell yourself.

 

OK, so don't be as honest as Bob Maplethorpe in regards to any extracurricular activities you may have participated in. Selling weed in high school doesn't really count as entrepreneurial experience, at least not to 99.99% of prospective employers. Although to excel and be on top of your street pharmaceutical game you do need a good sense for business. It's essential to have managerial skills, inventory taking abilities, an understanding of business math and all other sorts of potentially desirable traits many employers look for. But again, it's probably a bad idea to try to use that type of experience when illustrating your strengths. So, let them know that you "Really want to be a part of their team" and don't forget to tell them why. I'll elaborate more on Selling Yourself later on...

I'll get a job, when I hear the true call.

I'm still waiting for my true call. Although I think I may have finally found it, let's see if they feel the same way about me.

Good Philosophies (Randall)

Good Philosophies (Randall)

 Randall has to be one of my favorite fictional characters. No matter how much your job sucks, you have to have fun with it, even if that means shitting on customers (in the most polite and subtle way possible of course).

I see your hobbies are drinking, smoking weed, and all types of ill shit.

My pleasure is other people's leisure...

"In a word: pleasure. It's like, my pleasure is other people's leisure"

 

Dead Kennedys: At My Job

"Ever get the feeling you've been cheated?" - John Lydon

MDC's: I Hate Work

 Maybe hearing this album and knowing most of the lyrics to it when I was in about 2nd or 3rd grade (thanks to my older sister) helped to warp my brain?

Getting it moving...

So yeah, I'm trying to move forward with this little project. New ideas are being formulated and existing ones are coming to life...slowly, but slow is better than not at all.

More to come.

So...

I'm not going to work tonight. You know, to do more productive things like this.